That moment when you're super irritated and you know you shouldn't be but you are....

Happy Birthday My Beautiful Friend!

Man oh man my beautiful friend, I miss you like crazy. It is hard to believe that it has been 5 years 4 months since you were taken away from here. I am so happy that you are in Heaven, streets of gold, playing a harp and what not.....but I'm selfish and want you here.
Funny how things work. Just this week a dear friend confessd to me that she was in an abusive relationship. Because I'm selfish my first thought was to God "Are you freaking kidding me!?!? I don't want this, I don't want to have to be strong again, I don't. Why me?" but then I realized that becaue I had been down this horrid road with you that I am equipped to handle this situation with wisdom. So I did. Will it work? Sadly probably not. This week I have been flooded with emotions that involve you. I normally am pretty srong but you know sometimes you just need a good healthy cry. The kind that creates a lot of snot and you get the silent heaves because you are trying to be strong but your not sure why because you are home alone.
I want you to be here to remind me of all the quirks you had. What was your favorite custard: Vanilla or Lemon. I can't remember and its killing me! I think it was Lemon and you would always say it like "Lem-moan", remember when we would get it after playing put-putt in Muncie. I want to have conversations like we used to wabout stupid things like why you would leave Q-tips laying all around the house.
Nathan wrote a blog post about how you are still influencing people even after your gone. I'm writing a blogpost Bout how selfish I am because all I can think about is "What about me?" because I love you and miss you.

Kimology #3

I hate the little squares cut out of the side of the pool to suck water in, monsters could be hiding in there.

I call frozen pizza that you bake at home cardboard pizza.

I currently have magenta streaks in my hair.

I like for all of my money to be in order of denomination smallest to largest and all facing the same direction.

My favorite colors right now are pink and green.

I hate pastels.

I am insecure.

I love taking pictures yet I always let my husband keep the camera.

I love the ocean and the beach but I prefer a pool with a view.

My mom and dad divorced after 29 years of marriage when I was in the 8th grade.

I have no children yet.

Forget banking I'm back in the Hair biz!

I prefer to write with a pen that is not to fat or too skinny.

I have really thick hair.

I like organizing things.

I'm part of a church plant.

I treat my pets like they are furry little people.

I like to cook.

I miss my mom.

I really really really want a dog.

I love good surprise stuff in the mail.

Purchasing office supplies/school supplies makes me giddy.

Frozen vegetable that you microwave to steam in the bag are my favorite but I only like canned green beans.

How long will it take....

So I am in a trendy upscale salon. I love it. I do wonder when the point will come that I don't get a little jolt every time I hear one of the clients refer to their nanny or their guest house or their 2 month long vacation to Europe. It's the norm. It's not like they are bragging, this is just how their everyday life is.
One day I'm sure I will be immune to their wealth.....perhaps that day will be when they are paying ME to cater to their salon needs and not my master :0)
Yes when I am receiving the $160 for their tab plus my $20+ tip, yes that will be when I become immune to their wealth. Because they are sharing it with me!

I am lucky!

Looking at my husband who is stretched out taking a nap next to me on our bed and thinking "I am lucky because I have an incredibly sexy husband"

Goodbyes :'0(

I got up at the crack of Dawn this morning to get ready so my great friend Dawn and I could go on a shopping excursion in Indianapolis. We had originally planned to go see our friend JMe who moved up by Chicago awhile ago but after talking to JMe we decided that we were nuts to try and do that trip in one day. There would be no relaxation only running around and having a blast!

Dawn and I became good friends through a series of unfortunate events. Once we realized how well we meshed together and how natural it was for us to hang out it became routine to open up to each other and just be real. For that I am very thankful.

We had so much fun shopping and I wasn't planning on spending any money since I'm kinda broke now that I have no job but Bath and Body Works was having a major sale and by major I mean MAJOR. So naturally I stocked up!

We came back to my apartment and just chilled for a bit. She just left and now I'm sad. That was the last time that I will get to really hang with her for a long time. It wasn't a "goodbye" so much as a "see ya later" but even a see ya later hurts sometimes.

Since this is my last week here in the Midwest, I am having to say a lot of "goodbyes" & "See ya laters" this was really the first one. UGH.

I have a cram packed week of goodbyes. I am going to spend time with me mum tonight, Lunch with Cobi tomorrow, Picking up Nate tomorrow night (YAY YAY), Appointments Thursday, Hang with someone Thursday night, Jocelyn's goodbye, me mum again and Nate & Kate's on Friday (although I'm sure we will see Nate & Kate again before we leave), Saturday morning we get to see Marva's son Jackson to say "hello & goodbye" then we will probably spend time with Nate's parents or maybe Sunday, not to mention the lack of goodbye I had with V due to crazy demands and I have a whole list of others that I just can't work in.

If every there were a time to be mayonnaise! I would spread myself even more thin. I know I've let people down in this process but seriously I am only one person. I have done pretty good with this up until about now. I am used to goodbyes because I am a born and raised army brat, but now that I am older I have developed friendships that mean more to me. These are not just surface friendships but true friendships that are centered around Christ.

Even though me and my mom fight like cats and dogs I am gonna miss her like crazy. I'm pretty sure that my mother in law (who is riding out to Cali with me) will have to drive the first leg of the trip because I'm gonna be an emotional mess.

I'm also gonna miss my family who all live down south. I don't get to see them very often but its different since we will be a billion miles away now, a 32 hour drive or 5 hour flight.

And to top it all off I had to say goodbye to Winnie 6 weeks ago, my fish Kitty & Fido 5 weeks ago and Nate 4 weeks ago and live like a big girl. Praise Jesus he's gonna be here tomorrow!!!!

So yes this is a hard week: tissues, check!

Even though I am experiencing an emotional overload right now, I am happy to have been called on this mission. I want to bleed God's love over everyone I come in contact with. I am ready to take Escondido head on! Goodbyes have a heavy price but the work for God is priceless.

So as the Steve Fee song goes: I'LL GO ANYWHERE, I'LL DO ANYTHING, AT ANY COST FOR YOU MY KING!

If Hell were a happy place.....

My facebook status today was "If Hell were a happy place that is where I would have been today"
So close yet so far away. My last 2 weeks of work and its been hell so far but my God is a good God and I have been able to be happy no matter what is thrown at me!

Praise be to God my father!